Debunking College Myths: College Teaches Social Skills
Here’s one you’ve probably heard . . . College socializes students.
Nah, bruh. It doesn’t. It MIS-socializes them.
The “socializing” argument is one of those throwaway defenses people offer when everything else about higher ed crumbles: the crippling debt, the useless degrees, the lack of hard skills, the lack of soft skills.
“Well, one of the most important things college does is teach kids how to socialize!”
As if they didn’t go to college and someone walked up to them asking the time, they would punch the person in the neck because . . . well, they never went to college to learn how to socialize.
But here’s the real issue. It’s not that college doesn’t socialize kids.
College DOES teach you how to socialize, but . . . it teaches you the WRONG social skills.
It doesn’t teach you how to socialize like an adult;
it teaches you how to socialize like a teenager with no bedtime
Think about it. The most common social experiences in college?
Frat parties
Mixers
Dorm gossip
Blackout Wednesdays
"Bonding" through Mario Kart and Adderall-fueled all-nighters
These aren’t adult social skills.
these are the final boss level of adolescence
What 18-year-olds ACTUALLY need when they graduate high school isn’t four years of extended childhood.
They need an intentional path to adulthood—where socialization looks very different. They need to learn:
How to network across generations
How to make friends outside of an artificial, closed system like college
How to build relationships with colleagues and mentors
How to connect over ideas (not keg stands)
How to be the kind of person someone wants to work with AND grab dinner with (maybe even learn to pair the wine)
This is what adult socialization looks like. It’s what creates strong professional ties, real friendships, and meaningful community.
Sure, some people “come out of their shell” at college. But when they do, they usually emerge as the life of the tailgate—not as someone socially equipped for an adult world.
So yeah, socialization is important. It’s just not what colleges are doing.
what they call “socialization,” we call “mis-socialization”
They’re just extending adolescence.
What we need is a system that helps young people grow up.
